Mark Chmura will most definetely not be invited to Patriots’ Camp. And yes, I believe Fuck to be worthy of a capital beginning.
On the same day news broke of Travis Henry’s ousting, the Patriots have decided to feature a teenager in their 2008 Cheerleading Squad. Bravo, Belichick. Making Gillette Stadium a pedophile-haven had not even crossed my mind of possible ways to fuck with Goodell.
First of all, what the hell are her parents thinking? A urine-soaked stadium of drunken New Englanders would not be the ideal place for my teenage daughter to hone her sexually suggestive dancing.
Thanks to Deadspin for the link
Travis Henry link via The Big Lead
According to ESPN, the terrorist organization that is the Denver Broncos have signed Michael Pittman because Travis Henry has not reported to “optional” workouts. Has there ever been a more meaningless NFL transaction that has been this blatant in its disgust for the modern family? I say almost certainly no.
While Shanahan has been raising a “traditional” family, Mr. Henry has revolutionized the Catholic family (no actual proof of Henry’s catholicism. Just creating some decent justificache) Instead of pro-creating a large amount of children with one woman, Henry has instead chosen to pro-create a large amount of children with MANY women. Brilliant.
Come to think of it, Henry may be in the midst of a melding of old school Mormonism and Catholicism. Or just may be participating in old school Mormonism. My understanding of popular religion is underdeveloped at best and completely contrived at worst. Just like this blog post.
*After actually reading the story that corresponded with the ESPN headline, it turns out Henry has an injured hamstring. The financial responsibility of 18 people is a large burden.
**”Travis Henry children” has just revealed Henry is expecting his tenth child this November. I heard the tenth is the easiest.