The Curious Case of Andy Sonnanstine

Last nite the Jays’ were defeated by a man named Andy. Shocking, yes? I’ve only encountered two Andys in my lifetime, one being a effeminate pasty boy from my childhood and the other being Andy MacDonald, a man discarded by the Anaheim Ducks who I assume shares archetypal Andy qualities. So when the Jays’ lost to Andy, I was nothing less than embarassed. Besides carrying the name Andy, Mr. Sonnanstine was also cursed with the throwing motion of David Eckstein, which could best be described as effeminate (its a great word alrite). Awful. I hope AJ pulled a Najeh in his shoes (or an Osi. Whatever your preference) to restore the social hierarchy.

To counter the embarassment of having a man named Andy on their roster, the Rays’ threw out hollywood’s closer in the 9th, Mr. Troy Percival. Unlike the Smear, who only cut his hair in the likeness of a Major League character, Troy actually developed his body to look like the Duke. Thats dedication. But honestly, Percival is a horrifying man. A Jays-Rays brawl would be compelling television. The Beej!! and Percival would undoubtedly lock horns in the battle for most intimidating earthly presence, while the rest of the Jays’ would torture Andy with wet willies and wedgies.  

In the 6th, Overbay came within inches of tying the ballgame but came up short, costing the Jays the game. I hate you Lyle.

AJ had an interesting nite, striking out 10 and allowing 10 baserunners. Good stuff. Some figahs from the BR; so far this season, when RHB pull AJ’s pitches, they’re only 1 of 12 (.083) Traditionally, when RHB batters pull AJ’s stuff (ha), they’re .389. I have no idea what that means. Also strange has been the complete incompetence of the right side of the infield during AJ starts. So far this year, balls hit to the right side (whether there LHB pulling, or RHB spraying) have resulted in baserunnahs 14 of 26 times. To counter, balls to the left side (LHB spraying RHB pulling) have resulted in baserunnahs 5 of 25 times. Coincidence? Too early to call but undoubtedly no. Get my boy T-Snids up pronto.





Filed under AJ Burnett, AL East, B.J. Ryan, Baseball, Major League Baseball, Toronto Blue Jays, Troy Percival

4 responses to “The Curious Case of Andy Sonnanstine

  1. Hey, nice clip. Should be a reminder in this crazy political season never to bet against the idealism and happiness of the people (you know what I’m talking about, Mrs. Clinton).

  2. jays08

    Only the hopeful idealist could ever believe a suicide squeeze hit and run from 2nd base would work. Unlike Jake, Hillary would have taken the pitch and allowed her successor to perform. She would denounce that kind of baseball strategy as the work of an underexperienced and dangerous zealot.

  3. Aaah…. at last. Someone understands. Will you marry me?

  4. brett

    you’re knocking the name andy? pretty errant…give the dude props he is a stud

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