Undoubtedly not the Duchsch
Now that the Jays look as unbeatable as AC Slater with Alex in the stands (I think D-Ex is the Alex to Big Frank’s Slater. Eee, bad visual) I have resorted to cheering for opposing players with names that have the potential to be manipulated into disgusting wordplay (ie. Papelbon, Sox Fans – Papelboner, Jays Fans – We Just smeared the Pap (I can’t be held accountable for ignorant parallels I draw to female hygiene. All I know is it sounds funny and is potentially insulting)) I am hoping that Mr. Duchscherer mans up and pitches this series so all the Jays fans have a go to heckling target (now that Butterfield is in hiding). Usually, saying something obvious about someone’s name is considered shitty or subpar within the heckling community, the insult Douchebag (which I believe sounds like Mr. Justin’s name) is timeless. Like the dirty Pap (I’m sorry), it evokes uncertain anxiety about female hygiene that cannot be topped by any other word in the vernacular. That being said, get well soon Mr. Duchscherer, we will be eagerly awaiting your arrival.