Watch these two douches discuss the necessity of the “pimp-slap with a back hand” in Dirk’s repertoire. Was this commentary subbed in from the 1960s? How the hell can ABC allow their anchors to prescribe the “back hand” on national television?
Also, this is so contradictary to the preceding paragraph but whatever, [...]
Entries from April 2008
April 29, 2008
Pimp slap!?!?
April 28, 2008
How bad does Jason Kidd want it?
What, to murder a man with his bare hands? I guess theres history there. Yessss.
http://www.odenized.com/2008/04/jason-kidd-flips-jannero-pargo.html
Thanks to the Odenized (via Deadspin) for the clip of Jason Kidd simultaneously infuriating one state and causing another to stroke their collective Devin Harris poster (metaphor?) VC remains asleep.
April 26, 2008
Game Fouring
Half an hour away from game 4 of the Raps-Magic series and still no word on whether or not Jameer Nelson will play. Either way the Raps hold the advantage. Nelson played out of his mind the first two games and his corresponding drop in game 3 was nothing but inevitable. Now that he may [...]
April 26, 2008
JP + Billy 4VR
Right now I will attempt to reduce the shame that JP must be feeling by offering an absurd theory as to why he is currently paying for his old boss’ DH. An old boss that supposedly taught the young JP to avoid exorbitant contracts.
JP and Beane have got to be working some sort of backdoor deal here. The JP is [...]
April 25, 2008
Manic ACC assists Raps in Game 3 Victory
Tonite, the Raptors and a deviant ACC crowd defeated the Orlando Magic 108-94 in game 3 of their first round series. Behind some communist scoring (6 guys in double figures) and guard domination (Raptors guards – 56 points, Magic guards – 28 points), the Raptors guaranteed themselves a return trip to Orlando, whose crowd would have to drop a [...]
April 24, 2008
A Sign of Draft Exhaustion
So I’m browsing the ol Star-Tribune today and I came across this vital pseudo-prognostication:
Vikings Unlikely to draft running back
Despite universal agreement, the braintrust at the Star-Tribune chose to display this nugget as the top story on their Vikings page. According to sources at the Star, research was conducted during Kevin Seifert’s morning shit. The Star-Tribune: Tackling the Tough [...]
April 23, 2008
Drunk Jared salvages an Awful Night
Fuck YOU TAMPA!! ALLEN’S OURS!!!!
So I check out the sports schedule for tonite, and I instantly have to change my pants. We’re looking at 7th Caps-Flyers, Jays-Rays, Raps-Magic, Hil-Obams, and Suns-Spurs. What did I end up with? Fuckin nothin. My beloved Canadians lost out. My superficial president lost. And worst of all, Bettman launched a new [...]
April 23, 2008
Shit
Tom Poti admires the result he is destined for the rest of his life. Suck it HULL.
Fuck you POTI!! Did you spend your “playoff experience” fucking your mother? Even deranged Downie kept his shit in his pants. You spilt it like Osi.
Yo Bettman, you know how Stern froze the lope for Ewing? This was one [...]
April 22, 2008
Downie Syndrome
The result of too much Downie
eee thats an offensive post. Sorry, but nothing less could describe the puss that is Steve Downie. And guess what? We will all be treated to the Downs tonite when he makes his playoff debut. As if the casual fan didn’t have enough reason to cheer for the Capitals, the [...]
April 22, 2008
Ovechkin and a Series for the Books
Ovechkin taunting the Flyers’ fans after putting the Caps up for good. Strangely, I’m not pissed.
Tonite, the Washington Capitals rallied from 2-0 in the 2nd to pull out a 4-2 victory and send their series with the Philadelphia Flyers to a 7th game back in DC. And who was at the heart of it? The most [...]
